Friday night shoe porn goes S&M...

Yup, it's Friday night and I'm feeling alright (dinner cooked, rose poured) and it felt only right that we should take in some shoe porn. And, being Friday, I'm in a slightly rock 'n' roll mood: thus I am upping the sexy, fierce ante on the pornorific shoes. Ladies, bend over and brace yourselves because we are talking studs and spikes. Oh, alright, I'm not really going to whip out a studded spanking paddle or indeed hit you with a studded shoe. Some things are just a step too far...plus, I sure ain't getting backside all over these babies.

The studded shoe love was started for me by Christian Louboutin. I've always admired people brave enough to rock a studded biker or a spiked denim waistcoat and I love the punk look. It's just totally not my look (too many skinny leg trousers). Stick the spikes on a shoe though and I am all over it. Here are the Loubs...

Yum bitch!

 

Yes, I know they look like studded pimp slippers but I like 'em!

Now, Loubly (oh, do you see what I did there? Mega lolz) though this lot are, the £1k plus price tags make them somewhat out of my price range. Just somewhat. So when these beauties from Solestruck started dropping in my inbox, you know I took a second look. Sadly they're mainly still out of my budget but not in ridiculous style a la Christian's creations. I'm going to start with the ones I plan to blow the budget for when they're back in my size...the Lita stud.

Swoon! How bitching are these?! That's right: bitching! They have the things I love: a platform and chunky heel but, minus the studs, would actually be kind of plain for my tastes. But the studs are there. Oh, they're there. All of a sudden, a plain, albeit stompily high, boots goes from OK to oh, oh, oh!

Spikes on the Lita too fierce for you? Presenting the pimp slipper's pimped up cousin, the Lee by Matiko (nope, me either and I couldn't be bothered to read about the brand. This is all about visual pleasure), with a smaller more subtle spike. Again, it's in possession of some of my favourite things. No, no aphids on roses or dangleberries on kittens: leopard print and hairy! Duh! Yes, the spikes are the only subtle thing about these little winners. Now, where did I put my rhinestone studded smoking jacket?

Uh, huh, huh! I like to think that, when the King grows tired of blue suede shoes, he slips on these bad boys. Definitely more studded than spiked, I suspect his right royal Elvisness would be totes partial to the star shaped studs in particular. Ah, the wonder of shoooooooooes!

Time to ramp back up the fierce factor again. Well, you didn't honestly think I'd crack out a hairy leopard print flattie and not show you a heel too? Did you? Come on. These Sam Edelman heels first captured my attention a wee while back. At nearly $300, I've always resisted them but I definitely have hot, special feelings for their lusciousness. The only thing (aside from the obvious dollah) is that the reviews of the style seems to suggest that the spike weight make them a bugger to keep on your feet AND folk have been receiving them with cheeky missing studs too. So, for now, I am lusting but steering clear. Like one should might when it comes to a bad man.

 

You so cannot touch this. You cannot! I love the fact that these shoes need to be seen from more than one angle to give full appreciation of their hedgehog-tastic proportions. Spikier than your average cactus, they're a winner for many reasons. There's something so camp about their overt pinkness, yet something so fierce about their vicious barbs. Basically they're a drag queen. And I'm not gonna top that.

I pledge my allegiance to SHOES!

Yay! Yay for shoes! Let's be clear, I work in shoes so I'm surrounded by them all the time and can't help getting obsessed by them. However, the wider shoe world must just see me coming and laugh gleefully, rubbing their hands, safe in the knowledge their tills will soon be ringing. case in point: these Jeffrey Campbells:

You may recall I blogged about them a while back. And, as you may be able to tell (if you're a foot pervert or just, like, obsessed with me or something), these are them on my feet. Oh yes, I found myself with a little spare cashola and I made the dream a reality. It's like freakin' X factor or something, isn't it? Without the sob story or looking like total freakazoid and having the voice of an angel stuff going on. I do enjoy a freaky person with an amazers voice. It makes you question all your preconceptions and judgements and that's a nice thing. Until you realise that you're judgemental and have all kinds of preconceived ideas and really you should probably wash your mouth and brain out with nasty caustic soap. Anyway, look how happy me and the shoes are. Woo!

Shoes: Jeffrey Campbell @ Solestruck, Dress: Tesco, Shirt: Primark, Belt: H&M, Hairband: can't remember, badge: work

Jumpin'. So these are pair # 67. If you can't see what's awesome about them you're clearly blind. Or hate America so much you can't see past the design being like their flag. My feelings towards America are fairly neutral. Most people I've met there or from there are very nice and I shall judge it based on that. Ooh, except one girl who went out with a dude we knew. She was a massive douche. Still, see how I do not judge the rest of America on that basis #nonjudgemental. #noreally. Point being that I don't really give a crap about any flag and if you present me with a candy stripe heel and navy canvas upper resplendent with bold white star print, PLUS a fuck off platform and adorable t-bar all wrapped up in a totally comfy shoe, I am YOURS baby! Or you're mine. Whatever. Here they are again for your ogling pleasure. Brace yourself! I'm off to read some of my fave blogs!

I SO pledge my allegiance...

...to these shoes. Swoon! SWOON!The Jeffrey Campbell Foxy has been around, in various guises, for some time now. Sometimes I like them, sometimes I don't. This time I DO. The stars! The stripes! The platform! The t-bar!

A quick whip round my friends reveals that opinions are seriously divided on this one, with comments ranging from 'beast' and 'clumpy' to 'awesome' and 'wow'. I shouted out loud when I saw them.

Anyway, I'll let the pictures do the talking from here on in. I have an urgent call to take - it's Wonderwoman wanting her going out shoes back.

If you want to buy me a pair, you can get them here. (Click the word 'here' doofus!)

Pictures are from the Solestruck website. Don't hate on me.