Here I am!

Yup, I've been unforgiveably absent from here yet again. I'm gonna plead the same old crap as last time - work's mad busy and I'm just not for the computer come evening! Oh, plus, in more exciting news, I am making a dress and have been concentrating on that for the last few nights. That's ripe for a post when it's finished!

Anyway, let's not focus on my absence and short comings. Let us instead rejoice that I am here! Self important? Moi? I hope you all appreciate that, at this moment, my tongue is jammed hard inside my cheek.

So to this evening's topic. Vintage skirt. It's the skirt I bought at April's flea market for a bargain four quid. Haggled down from a fiver. Yes it's only a pound but it's also 20% and it covered the cost of the picture I bought the same day. Incidentally, while I have my sewing machine out, I'm also working on the neckline of the amazing Frank Usher dress I got. Anyway here's the skirt all dressed up:

I felt with it's fullness, it had to be done slightly 50s style and I decided a 3/4 sleeve would be good with it. What do you think? I was feeling particularly brave so I went with the colour pop tights and my pretty purple Matalan platforms. Waist nipping was courtesy of a Primark belt. Ta-da!

I love this belt but it goes with bugger all so I was glad it found a garish match in this skirt!

I got the cute necklace ages ago from...Asda! In fact, this is one of my all time cheap-tastic outfits as the top was from the American Apparel sale, the shoes were a bargain too and I'm fairly sure the sunglasses are Primark!

Warning! This post looks like a load of crap eBay listings...

I'm not joking. It is literally just pictures of clothes on my bed. You could come to my house on any given day and see a sight like this because I am messy. That's right, I am a messy bugger. I leave crap lying about everywhere (a bare surface is just an un-utilised storage space for me) and, especially leave clothes lying about on the bed. I tidy them all away before I sleep in it.

Anyway, the purpose of this post is not to afford you a sneak peek into my slovenly shame but, instead, to shamelessly flaunt some bargains in yo' face. In yo' face!

Did any of you happen to catch the American Apparel April Fool's sale? I did, courtesy of a sharing kinda colleague who sent me the email. They claimed they were giving away a bunch of free shit and, initially, I assumed it was, as they stated, an April Fool. Heck, even the code to enter at checkout was april1st or aprilfool (I can't remember which. Who honestly cares? Point is, it felt like they were messing with me!). The dealio was that if you spent over a tenner, you could claim up to 5 selected things free by entering aforementioned code of fool-tastic-ness at checkout. Seemed like a swizz to get me on site and browsing but I was off work and most likely sitting about scratching my behind so it seemed like a fair waste of time. Plus, I knew I wasn't gonna fork out a load of money on site for two reasons. One - I had no money. Two - AA stuff is OK but, for the prices they ordinarily charge, the quality can be questionable. I applaud the fact that they're sweat shop free but if the quality is guff, the fashion maths don't add up. Anyway, as luck would have it, the offer was NOT a swizz and they had some ridic sale items on site too. Here's what I bagged for a tenner (yup, ten pounds* - you'll understand my use of bold as you scroll down and absorb the size of the bounty) plus four quid postage.

A gold lame braided belt. FREE. I can't decide whether to belt something with this, wind it round my head in the style of either a hippy or 'boho babe' or to just style it with a smoking jacket and velvet slippers and become a pimp.

5 baseball tops! £1.50 each. I'm well on my way to starting a team!

2 boring t-shirts for the gym. FREE. They're handy to have now that I genuinely go to the gym heaps. 5 classes and a swim steam/sauna so far this week - FACT!

a bikini top that barely covers the nips. FREE! No doubt if I keep this gym habit up my boobs will wilt away to nothing. Then I'll be glad of this baby. Or maybe I'll just find my inner beach ho style this summer.

A denim braided belt. FREE. This one does not have the same big pimpin' style as the other but I'm sure I'll find a use for it...

A black jersey skirt/dress. £2.60. As a high waisted skirt it's loose on the waist, tight on the hips and a weird length. Pulled up as a dress it skims nicely and is just the right length. Banging.

That's all folks!

*For the mathematically pernickity among you, yes the grand total was actually £10.10.

What the *&% you looking at?

Seriously, what the fuck is my problem in this picture? I look like the camera's just told me that my quiff's falling apart and that, in retrospect, shoes number 20, yes 20, from schuh, aren't actually the best choice to go with this outfit. And, following such insults, I clearly want to kill the camera. Oh dear.

Actually, I'm starting to feel a little murderous right now. They've changed blogger and you can't upload pics and type at the same time now and the picture editor while, in the main, better, is kind of a pain in the arse. So, anyway, there we have it - my murder stare. And here are the shoes that I was so unsure about:

(Still hating on blogger - maybe I should move to typepad or another blog thing, none of the names of which I remember right now. Tumblr - ha!) The thing about the shoes is that I loved them when I bought them and I wore them all the time. (and I bought them in pink, purple and black with gold leopard print - oh you'll see them all at some point). I loved the nice square toe, the shiny patent, the killer heel and the concealed platform. But patent and skinny heels come and go for me and right now I'm not mad hot about these babies. I'm like a bad mother with favourites and just now, these are my kid that I wish would just shut the fuck up and behave. Go to your room!

Maybe they're just bad with these jeans. I acknowledge that, despite the fact that I've worn them all my life, jeans are not my best friend and often serve only to my my arse, and more particularly, my thighs, look E-FRIGGIN-NORMOUS. These particular jeans are not too bad for it. They're indigo (big thigh friendly tick) and they have a wide but not too wide leg (big thigh friendly tick). So far so good. The problem is they're just not really long enough to wear with a heel, especially a spindly one. Jeans and heels incompatibility aside, I don't mind this look for a can't be bothered day. I like my dark grey American Apparel tee and I like my red and grey striped Primark cardi. I LOVE my Lady Luck rules ladybird necklace! In fact, if I'd just worn my smelly old Cons, my face would probably be smiling. Well ain't that a lesson learned.

Anyway, according to sky plus, I've kept Fearne Cotton and Beth Ditto waiting 58mins now so I'm gonna go see what wisdom pearls (ahem) they have to share. Here's my lovely necklace to keep you all entertained while I'm away.